One of my all time favourite films is Trainspotting, and I was thinking about that famous quote (y’know, the “choose life” one) a lot today. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not comparing my life to that of a heroin addict (unless you count coffee as the ultimate drug?!) But I do find that whenever big life choices come my way, my brain automatically takes itself back to my student days, which were mostly spent smoking cheap roll-ups and watching Trainspotting waiting for the epic end scene!
Have I Chosen Life?
If Rent-Boy was going to test me on whether or not I’ve chosen life, then right now I think I’d be big fat failure. Have I chosen all of those things? The answer is no, not really. But I have chosen some of them… As for the rest, it just doesn’t work for me right now. So maybe Rent-Boy would want to be my mate, because actually I’ve chosen my heroin. I’ve chosen happiness. And sometimes, that just doesn’t go hand in hand with everything else.
I always worry (and probably always will) that choosing to put my career on hold while the kids are young has meant ultimately putting part of myself on hold. But the reality of it is that, pre-kids, working was what made me happy. Things are very different now, and working is simply what pays the bills. As much as I work very hard doing what I do now, and always give my employer the best that I have to offer, it simply isn’t the be all and end all of what makes me tick anymore. Watching my kids grow and learn, and being there to help them along their journey is truly what makes me happy, and that is what I live for now.
But why would I want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life. I chose somethin’ else. And the reasons? There are no reasons. Who needs reasons when you’ve got
heroinkids? – Mark ‘Rent-Boy’ Renton
Just like Rent-Boy chose not to choose life, to choose heroin, I have chosen not to choose life. At least not that life. I’d be lying if I said there weren’t days I wished I had my salary back, but I’d also be lying if I told you I’d be willing to go back to working 60+ hours a week for it!
We are by no stretch of the imagination ‘well off’ right now, but we’re making it work. Some months are harder than others, but to be honest the basics are always covered. I find it only becomes ‘hard’ when the daily coffee fix has to take a back seat! No one likes to deprive themselves, but at least for now I’m choosing to sacrifice the little things so that we can do the bigger things for the kids. The ‘this will have an impact on the rest of your life’ things…
In my really really boring version of the film, this is how my end monologue would go.
What’s My Point?
My point is very simple. Rent-Boy chose heroin. I choose the simple life. I’ve chosen what works for me, right now, just like he did I suppose. We all just have to choose what is right for us, right now, whatever that might be. There is no such thing as perfection, no such thing as the ever elusive ‘having it all’.
So What The Hell Is Stress Free Mamahood About?!
Everything I have chosen feeds quite nicely into my new/planned Stress-Free Mamahood series, and this is where you come in. You can find the direct link to my exclusive Stress-Free Mamahood club on Instagram, where you will find tips, tricks, and my experiences in how I’ve honed (almost) stress-free parenting. I’m also looking for bloggers’ input for a series I’d like to run on the blog sharing your tips and tricks on the things you do (no matter how big or small) to keep the stress levels to a minimum in your own, unique parenting journeys.
If you’re interested in being featured (usual backlinks up for grabs!) just pop me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will get back to you with more details, fo sho!