On Monday I talked about leaving my job and choosing to stay at home with the kids. I haven’t fully come to terms with my new role in the family yet. I still have days when I feel like I’m lazy, like I should be doing more. Days when I feel crappy for not bringing in any money, when I miss the feeling of providing.
I’m At Home, He’s At Work
Blogging aside, and no matter how much I try to swing it in my mind, that’s the reality for us right now. At 9am Mr C takes himself up the office and does a day’s work, while I stay with the kids.
We do a lot during the day, and I rarely sit down! I’d be lying if I said being at home with my kids isn’t a way better option than going to work in the morning. But I’d also be lying if I said being at home is always fun and always easy. There’s no room for laziness when you’re at home with young kids. Lazy days always descend into chaos within minutes, it’s just not worth it!
I have always enjoyed the schedule and routine of work, and I guess that’s why I set myself blogging targets throughout the day. I do little bits when I can, and then really focus my energy on it in the evenings.
Whether I like it or not, during the day my new role is essentially housewife. We’ve always shared chores equally depending on our work situations, so when I was working loads Mr C did more at home and vice versa. The housework during the day is part of my new role, but that’s not to say that Mr C doesn’t still have to do his fair share!
To be honest, he’s great (most of the time!) He pulls his weight around the house, and is definitely the tidier of the two of us. Once 5pm hits, any household chores are equally split. I do what I can during the day, but whatever is left after 5 is shared. Sometimes there’s a lot, sometimes not much at all. The reality of being a grown up and a parent of small kids is that there are always chores to do, whether you’ve been at work all day or not!
Something For Me
I have actively chosen to stay at home for a while, but I honestly don’t think I could do it without the blog to give me a purpose other than mum.
I never would have described myself as particularly maternal, and never in a million years would I have thought that I would be happy to stay at home. I was career driven beyond reason before I had kids. But I do feel like something has shifted, like my purpose in life has changed. Simplicity and slowing down suddenly feels so much more important than it ever did before.
We’re Equal… Aren’t We?
The truth is, we’re both less knackered now. Neither of us has to commute to work anymore, which means both of us get up later than we used to. It means we get to enjoy all our mealtimes together as a family, and it means the kids are getting way more time with both of us. Not only are they getting more time, but they’re getting better time, because we’re both less stressed and less tired which makes us better parents.
Being at home, in that sense, is way easier than what we were both doing before. Sometimes being at home is more fun than when I was at work, that’s true. But rest assured, I’m not sitting on my backside all day! Mealtimes aren’t happening as if by magic, I get less coffee breaks, no lunch break, and the remuneration sucks!
Right now, though, I wouldn’t change our lives.